I am really sorry heheh but i just couldn't pass this one up!
Sunday, January 25, 2009
The Daily mail (UK) wrote this editorial about Obama on 1-06-09. Obama’s Victory—A British view. Oh and by the way I didn’t write this.
A victory for the hysterical Oprah Winfrey, the mad racist preacher Jeremiah Wright, the US mainstream media who abandoned any sense of objectivity long ago, Europeans who despise America largely because they depend on her, comics who claim to be dangerous and fearless but would not dare attack genuinely powerful special interest groups. A victory for Obama-worshippers everywhere. A victory for the cult of the cult. A man who has done little with his life but has written about his achievements as if he had found the cure for cancer in between winning a marathon and building a nuclear reactor with his teeth. Victory for style over substance, hyperbole over history, rabble-raising over reality. A victory for Hollywood, the most dysfunctional community in the world. Victory for Streisand, Spielberg, Soros, Moore, and Sarandon. Victory for those who prefer welfare to will and interference to independence. For those who settle for group think and herd mentality rather than those who fight for individual initiative and the right to be out of step with meager political fashion. Victory for a man who is no friend of freedom. He and his people have already stated that media has to be controlled so as to be balanced, without realizing the extraordinary irony within that statement. Like most liberal zealots, the Obama worshippers constantly speak of Fox and Limbaugh, when the vast bulk of television stations and newspapers are drastically liberal and anti-conservative. Senior Democrat Chuck Schumer said that just as pornography should be censored, so should talk radio. In other words, one of the few free and open means of popular expression may well be cornered and beaten by bullies who even in triumph cannot tolerate any criticism and opposition. A victory for those who believe the state is better qualified to raise children than the family for those who prefer teachers’ unions to teaching and for those who are naively convinced that if the West is sufficiently weak towards its enemies, war and terror will dissolve as quickly as the tears on the face of a leftist celebrity. A victory for social democracy even after most Europe has come to the painful conclusion that social democracy leads to mediocrity, failure, unemployment, inflation, higher taxes and economic stagnation. A victory for intrusive lawyers, banal sentimentalists, social extremists and urban snobs.
Saturday, January 24, 2009
Rick Warren’s Prayer at the Inauguration
Almighty God, our father, everything we see and everything we can’t see exists because of you alone. It all comes from you, it all belongs to you. It all exists for your glory. History is your story. The Scripture tells us “Hear, oh Israel, the Lord is our god; the Lord is one.” And you are the compassionate and merciful one.And you are loving to everyone you have made. Now today, we rejoice not only in America’s peaceful transfer of power for the 44th time.We celebrate a hinge-point of history with the inauguration of our first African-American president of the United States. We are so grateful to live in this land, a land of unequaled possibility, where the son of an African immigrant can rise to the highest level of our leadership. And we know today that Dr. King and a great cloud of witnesses are shouting in Heaven. Give to our new president Barack Obama the wisdom to lead us with humility, the courage to lead us with integrity, the compassion to lead us with generosity. Bless and protect him, his family, Vice President Biden, the Cabinet, and every one of our freely elected leaders. Help us, oh God, to remember that we are Americans, united not by race or religion or blood, but to our commitment to freedom and justice for all. When we focus on ourselves, when we fight each other, when we forget you, forgive us. When we presume that our greatness and our prosperity is ours alone, forgive us. When we fail to treat our fellow human beings and all the Earth with the respect that they deserve, forgive us. And as we face these difficult days ahead, may we have a new birth of clarity in our aims, responsibility in our actions, humility in our approaches, and civility in our attitudes, even when we differ. Help us to share, to serve and to seek the common good of all. May all people of good will today join together to work for a more just, a more healthy and a more prosperous nation and a peaceful planet. And may we never forget that one day all nations and all people will stand accountable before you. We now commit our new president and his wife, Michelle and his daughters, Malia and Sasha, into your loving care. I humbly ask this in the name of the one who changed my life: Yeshua, Essa (ph), Jesus, Jesus, who taught us to pray, “Our Father who art in Heaven hallowed be thy name, thy kingdom come, thy will be done on Earth as it is in Heaven. Give us this day our daily bread and forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us, and lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil, for thine is the kingdom and the power and the glory forever.”
Rev. Lowery Inauguration benediction. Transcript.
God of our weary years, God of our silent tears, thou who has brought us thus far along the way, thou who has by thy might led us into the light, keep us forever in the path, we pray, lest our feet stray from the places, our God, where we met thee, lest our hearts, drunk with the wine of the world, we forget thee. Shadowed beneath thy hand may we forever stand -- true to thee, O God, and true to our native land. We truly give thanks for the glorious experience we've shared this day. We pray now, O Lord, for your blessing upon thy servant, Barack Obama, the 44th president of these United States, his family and his administration. He has come to this high office at a low moment in the national and, indeed, the global fiscal climate. But because we know you got the whole world in your hand, we pray for not only our nation, but for the community of nations. Our faith does not shrink, though pressed by the flood of mortal ills. For we know that, Lord, you're able and you're willing to work through faithful leadership to restore stability, mend our brokenness, heal our wounds and deliver us from the exploitation of the poor or the least of these and from favoritism toward the rich, the elite of these. We thank you for the empowering of thy servant, our 44th president, to inspire our nation to believe that, yes, we can work together to achieve a more perfect union. And while we have sown the seeds of greed -- the wind of greed and corruption, and even as we reap the whirlwind of social and economic disruption, we seek forgiveness and we come in a spirit of unity and solidarity to commit our support to our president by our willingness to make sacrifices, to respect your creation, to turn to each other and not on each other. And now, Lord, in the complex arena of human relations, help us to make choices on the side of love, not hate; on the side of inclusion, not exclusion; tolerance, not intolerance. And as we leave this mountaintop, help us to hold on to the spirit of fellowship and the oneness of our family. Let us take that power back to our homes, our workplaces, our churches, our temples, our mosques, or wherever we seek your will. Bless President Barack, First Lady Michelle. Look over our little, angelic Sasha and Malia. We go now to walk together, children, pledging that we won't get weary in the difficult days ahead. We know you will not leave us alone, with your hands of power and your heart of love. Help us then, now, Lord, to work for that day when nation shall not lift up sword against nation, when tanks will be beaten into tractors, when every man and every woman shall sit under his or her own vine and fig tree, and none shall be afraid; when justice will roll down like waters and righteousness as a mighty stream. Lord, in the memory of all the saints who from their labors rest, and in the joy of a new beginning, we ask you to help us work for that day when black will not be asked to get back, when brown can stick around -- (laughter) -- when yellow will be mellow -- (laughter) -- when the red man can get ahead, man -- (laughter) -- and when white will embrace what is right. Let all those who do justice and love mercy say amen. AUDIENCE: Amen! REV. LOWERY: Say amen -- AUDIENCE: Amen! REV. LOWERY: -- and amen. AUDIENCE: Amen! (Cheers, applause.) END. http://blogs.suntimes.com/sweet/2009/01/rev_lowery_inauguration_benedi.html
Some news media reports:
WASHINGTON -- The Rev. Rick Warren, by invoking the name of Jesus as he's known in several faiths, heralded the historic presidency Tuesday of an African-American man elected by Americans of multiple races, ethnicities and cultures. Mr. Warren, one of the country's most prominent evangelical ministers, referred to Jesus in Hebrew, Arabic, Spanish and English in his inauguration prayer, and added: "Help us, O God, to remember that we are Americans, united not by race or religion or blood, but to our commitment to freedom and justice for all.''Mr. Warren's prayer not only asked for blessings for Barack Obama and his family, but emphasized tolerance and forgiveness -- urging his countrymen to overcome their disagreements and to unite behind their mutual goals, with humility and civility. "When we focus on ourselves, when we fight each other, when we forget you, forgive us," he said. "When we fail to treat our fellow human beings and all the Earth with the respect that they deserve, forgive us. Mr. Warren seemed eager to put aside the last few weeks, and perhaps the last several years, of conflict that has pitted conservatives and liberals over thorny social issues. For some, it was an unexpected olive branch offered by a man who had offended part of President Obama's base when he lent his support to a winning California proposition that banned gay marriage. Mr. Warren's comments after he was chosen by Mr. Obama did little to salve the hurt. He even seemed to equate relations between gays to illegal acts such as incest. Mr. Warren's words, preceding the oaths of office, drew a mixed reaction from the millions watching. There were some hisses from the crowd gathered at the Newseum, a museum of the newspaper industry, one attendee said. Others said they thought Mr. Warren had managed to ease some of the hurt triggered by his selection. Dottie Hall, a former public-school principal from Austin, Texas, said that the choice of Mr. Warren was a "little tragic at first," but that he "ended up doing OK." She said she hoped the new president might teach Mr. Warren something about "equality for all." Some Christians said they were struck by Mr. Warren's references to other faiths. Invoking other religions shows "he is appreciative of, or at least courteous to, people who don't share his particular faith,'' says William Martin, senior fellow at the Baker Institute at Rice University, and a biographer of the Rev. Billy Graham, the evangelical leader who offered blessings at several inaugurations. "He is trying to be as inclusive as he can be.'' But Mr. Warren also mentioned Jesus in his reference to several faiths: "I humbly ask this in the name of the one who changed my life, Jeshua, Isa, Jesus [pronounced "Hay-sus"], Jesus, who taught us to pray...." http://online.wsj.com/article/SB123249891036400529.html
Warren pressed Obama on two hot-button issues among social conservatives: abortion and same-sex marriage. Obama said that although he's pro-choice and supports Roe v. Wade, his goal is to reduce the number of abortions in America. "On this particular issue, if you believe that life begins at conception ... and you are consistent, then I can't argue with you on that," he said. "What I can do is say, are there ways we can work together to reduce the number of unwanted pregnancies?" He also touched on same-sex marriage. When asked to define marriage, he told Warren, "It's a union between a man and a woman." "For me as a Christian, it is a sacred union. God's in the mix," he said. Obama added that he does support same-sex civil unions, saying, "I can afford those civil rights to others even if I don't have ... that view." http://www.cnn.com/2008/POLITICS/08/16/warren.forum/
Well today was an incredible day for Americans. I really didn’t have time to watch the festivities because I was out “sharing the wealth.” But I wanted to take some time to at least comment on several issues concerning the two prayers that were given, one by Rick Warren, and one by Rev. Lowery. First you have the prayer by Warren then the prayer by Lowery. After those two prayers will be a news report, then an article concerning the interview with Obama at Warren’s church. Now the sources are at the bottom of all the articles as to where they were found. It may sound confusing as to why I am doing this but you will see in my writing how I am going to bring all of this together to show how people get all caught up in things and they don’t seem to remember what someone said, nor actually do they care, they just run on emotions…well happy reading.
In reference to Warren’s prayer, I didn’t see anything that would offend anyone except the part where he gave Jesus credit for helping him in his life. That probably offended those that obviously do not believe in Christianity. However Rev. Lowery and his prayer, I have a little problem with. He got a little political when he said “heal our wounds and deliver us from the exploitation of the poor or the least of these and from favoritism toward the rich, the elite of these.” Kind of makes it sound like that the poor among us are being exploited. I do believe that there are those that are being treated as such. But to make a blanket statement like that is not correct. And this statement, “we ask you to help us work for that day when black will not be asked to get back, when brown can stick around -- (laughter) -- when yellow will be mellow -- (laughter) -- when the red man can get ahead, man -- (laughter) -- and when white will embrace what is right. Let all those who do justice and love mercy say amen. AUDIENCE: Amen! REV. LOWERY: Say amen -- AUDIENCE: Amen! REV. LOWERY: -- and amen. AUDIENCE: Amen! (Cheers, applause.)” END. A little over the top I would say. But then all of those that the reverend talked about won’t have to worry anymore, cause Barak is here and they will be rich, and they won’t have to worry about any prejudices cause their Savior has arrived. Now in reference to the news articles from :http://online.wsj.com/article/SB123249891036400529.htmlI do not understand where this writer stated that Warren offended gays when Obama in his interview that was quoted in:http://www.cnn.com/2008/POLITICS/08/16/warren.forum/, He also touched on same-sex marriage. When asked to define marriage, he told Warren, "It's a union between a man and a woman." "For me as a Christian, it is a sacred union. God's in the mix," he said. Obama added that he does support same-sex civil unions, saying, "I can afford those civil rights to others even if I don't have ... that view." When gays supported Obama, how could she say that they were offended? Is she also saying that the gays should be offended with Obama too? Hmmmm. Well that is about all I got to say about all this so far, and I bet you all are tired of all this reading but then I wanted to put it down for the sake of posterity. So we will get back to business.
Almighty God, our father, everything we see and everything we can’t see exists because of you alone. It all comes from you, it all belongs to you. It all exists for your glory. History is your story. The Scripture tells us “Hear, oh Israel, the Lord is our god; the Lord is one.” And you are the compassionate and merciful one.And you are loving to everyone you have made. Now today, we rejoice not only in America’s peaceful transfer of power for the 44th time.We celebrate a hinge-point of history with the inauguration of our first African-American president of the United States. We are so grateful to live in this land, a land of unequaled possibility, where the son of an African immigrant can rise to the highest level of our leadership. And we know today that Dr. King and a great cloud of witnesses are shouting in Heaven. Give to our new president Barack Obama the wisdom to lead us with humility, the courage to lead us with integrity, the compassion to lead us with generosity. Bless and protect him, his family, Vice President Biden, the Cabinet, and every one of our freely elected leaders. Help us, oh God, to remember that we are Americans, united not by race or religion or blood, but to our commitment to freedom and justice for all. When we focus on ourselves, when we fight each other, when we forget you, forgive us. When we presume that our greatness and our prosperity is ours alone, forgive us. When we fail to treat our fellow human beings and all the Earth with the respect that they deserve, forgive us. And as we face these difficult days ahead, may we have a new birth of clarity in our aims, responsibility in our actions, humility in our approaches, and civility in our attitudes, even when we differ. Help us to share, to serve and to seek the common good of all. May all people of good will today join together to work for a more just, a more healthy and a more prosperous nation and a peaceful planet. And may we never forget that one day all nations and all people will stand accountable before you. We now commit our new president and his wife, Michelle and his daughters, Malia and Sasha, into your loving care. I humbly ask this in the name of the one who changed my life: Yeshua, Essa (ph), Jesus, Jesus, who taught us to pray, “Our Father who art in Heaven hallowed be thy name, thy kingdom come, thy will be done on Earth as it is in Heaven. Give us this day our daily bread and forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us, and lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil, for thine is the kingdom and the power and the glory forever.”
Rev. Lowery Inauguration benediction. Transcript.
God of our weary years, God of our silent tears, thou who has brought us thus far along the way, thou who has by thy might led us into the light, keep us forever in the path, we pray, lest our feet stray from the places, our God, where we met thee, lest our hearts, drunk with the wine of the world, we forget thee. Shadowed beneath thy hand may we forever stand -- true to thee, O God, and true to our native land. We truly give thanks for the glorious experience we've shared this day. We pray now, O Lord, for your blessing upon thy servant, Barack Obama, the 44th president of these United States, his family and his administration. He has come to this high office at a low moment in the national and, indeed, the global fiscal climate. But because we know you got the whole world in your hand, we pray for not only our nation, but for the community of nations. Our faith does not shrink, though pressed by the flood of mortal ills. For we know that, Lord, you're able and you're willing to work through faithful leadership to restore stability, mend our brokenness, heal our wounds and deliver us from the exploitation of the poor or the least of these and from favoritism toward the rich, the elite of these. We thank you for the empowering of thy servant, our 44th president, to inspire our nation to believe that, yes, we can work together to achieve a more perfect union. And while we have sown the seeds of greed -- the wind of greed and corruption, and even as we reap the whirlwind of social and economic disruption, we seek forgiveness and we come in a spirit of unity and solidarity to commit our support to our president by our willingness to make sacrifices, to respect your creation, to turn to each other and not on each other. And now, Lord, in the complex arena of human relations, help us to make choices on the side of love, not hate; on the side of inclusion, not exclusion; tolerance, not intolerance. And as we leave this mountaintop, help us to hold on to the spirit of fellowship and the oneness of our family. Let us take that power back to our homes, our workplaces, our churches, our temples, our mosques, or wherever we seek your will. Bless President Barack, First Lady Michelle. Look over our little, angelic Sasha and Malia. We go now to walk together, children, pledging that we won't get weary in the difficult days ahead. We know you will not leave us alone, with your hands of power and your heart of love. Help us then, now, Lord, to work for that day when nation shall not lift up sword against nation, when tanks will be beaten into tractors, when every man and every woman shall sit under his or her own vine and fig tree, and none shall be afraid; when justice will roll down like waters and righteousness as a mighty stream. Lord, in the memory of all the saints who from their labors rest, and in the joy of a new beginning, we ask you to help us work for that day when black will not be asked to get back, when brown can stick around -- (laughter) -- when yellow will be mellow -- (laughter) -- when the red man can get ahead, man -- (laughter) -- and when white will embrace what is right. Let all those who do justice and love mercy say amen. AUDIENCE: Amen! REV. LOWERY: Say amen -- AUDIENCE: Amen! REV. LOWERY: -- and amen. AUDIENCE: Amen! (Cheers, applause.) END. http://blogs.suntimes.com/sweet/2009/01/rev_lowery_inauguration_benedi.html
Some news media reports:
WASHINGTON -- The Rev. Rick Warren, by invoking the name of Jesus as he's known in several faiths, heralded the historic presidency Tuesday of an African-American man elected by Americans of multiple races, ethnicities and cultures. Mr. Warren, one of the country's most prominent evangelical ministers, referred to Jesus in Hebrew, Arabic, Spanish and English in his inauguration prayer, and added: "Help us, O God, to remember that we are Americans, united not by race or religion or blood, but to our commitment to freedom and justice for all.''Mr. Warren's prayer not only asked for blessings for Barack Obama and his family, but emphasized tolerance and forgiveness -- urging his countrymen to overcome their disagreements and to unite behind their mutual goals, with humility and civility. "When we focus on ourselves, when we fight each other, when we forget you, forgive us," he said. "When we fail to treat our fellow human beings and all the Earth with the respect that they deserve, forgive us. Mr. Warren seemed eager to put aside the last few weeks, and perhaps the last several years, of conflict that has pitted conservatives and liberals over thorny social issues. For some, it was an unexpected olive branch offered by a man who had offended part of President Obama's base when he lent his support to a winning California proposition that banned gay marriage. Mr. Warren's comments after he was chosen by Mr. Obama did little to salve the hurt. He even seemed to equate relations between gays to illegal acts such as incest. Mr. Warren's words, preceding the oaths of office, drew a mixed reaction from the millions watching. There were some hisses from the crowd gathered at the Newseum, a museum of the newspaper industry, one attendee said. Others said they thought Mr. Warren had managed to ease some of the hurt triggered by his selection. Dottie Hall, a former public-school principal from Austin, Texas, said that the choice of Mr. Warren was a "little tragic at first," but that he "ended up doing OK." She said she hoped the new president might teach Mr. Warren something about "equality for all." Some Christians said they were struck by Mr. Warren's references to other faiths. Invoking other religions shows "he is appreciative of, or at least courteous to, people who don't share his particular faith,'' says William Martin, senior fellow at the Baker Institute at Rice University, and a biographer of the Rev. Billy Graham, the evangelical leader who offered blessings at several inaugurations. "He is trying to be as inclusive as he can be.'' But Mr. Warren also mentioned Jesus in his reference to several faiths: "I humbly ask this in the name of the one who changed my life, Jeshua, Isa, Jesus [pronounced "Hay-sus"], Jesus, who taught us to pray...." http://online.wsj.com/article/SB123249891036400529.html
Warren pressed Obama on two hot-button issues among social conservatives: abortion and same-sex marriage. Obama said that although he's pro-choice and supports Roe v. Wade, his goal is to reduce the number of abortions in America. "On this particular issue, if you believe that life begins at conception ... and you are consistent, then I can't argue with you on that," he said. "What I can do is say, are there ways we can work together to reduce the number of unwanted pregnancies?" He also touched on same-sex marriage. When asked to define marriage, he told Warren, "It's a union between a man and a woman." "For me as a Christian, it is a sacred union. God's in the mix," he said. Obama added that he does support same-sex civil unions, saying, "I can afford those civil rights to others even if I don't have ... that view." http://www.cnn.com/2008/POLITICS/08/16/warren.forum/
Well today was an incredible day for Americans. I really didn’t have time to watch the festivities because I was out “sharing the wealth.” But I wanted to take some time to at least comment on several issues concerning the two prayers that were given, one by Rick Warren, and one by Rev. Lowery. First you have the prayer by Warren then the prayer by Lowery. After those two prayers will be a news report, then an article concerning the interview with Obama at Warren’s church. Now the sources are at the bottom of all the articles as to where they were found. It may sound confusing as to why I am doing this but you will see in my writing how I am going to bring all of this together to show how people get all caught up in things and they don’t seem to remember what someone said, nor actually do they care, they just run on emotions…well happy reading.
In reference to Warren’s prayer, I didn’t see anything that would offend anyone except the part where he gave Jesus credit for helping him in his life. That probably offended those that obviously do not believe in Christianity. However Rev. Lowery and his prayer, I have a little problem with. He got a little political when he said “heal our wounds and deliver us from the exploitation of the poor or the least of these and from favoritism toward the rich, the elite of these.” Kind of makes it sound like that the poor among us are being exploited. I do believe that there are those that are being treated as such. But to make a blanket statement like that is not correct. And this statement, “we ask you to help us work for that day when black will not be asked to get back, when brown can stick around -- (laughter) -- when yellow will be mellow -- (laughter) -- when the red man can get ahead, man -- (laughter) -- and when white will embrace what is right. Let all those who do justice and love mercy say amen. AUDIENCE: Amen! REV. LOWERY: Say amen -- AUDIENCE: Amen! REV. LOWERY: -- and amen. AUDIENCE: Amen! (Cheers, applause.)” END. A little over the top I would say. But then all of those that the reverend talked about won’t have to worry anymore, cause Barak is here and they will be rich, and they won’t have to worry about any prejudices cause their Savior has arrived. Now in reference to the news articles from :http://online.wsj.com/article/SB123249891036400529.htmlI do not understand where this writer stated that Warren offended gays when Obama in his interview that was quoted in:http://www.cnn.com/2008/POLITICS/08/16/warren.forum/, He also touched on same-sex marriage. When asked to define marriage, he told Warren, "It's a union between a man and a woman." "For me as a Christian, it is a sacred union. God's in the mix," he said. Obama added that he does support same-sex civil unions, saying, "I can afford those civil rights to others even if I don't have ... that view." When gays supported Obama, how could she say that they were offended? Is she also saying that the gays should be offended with Obama too? Hmmmm. Well that is about all I got to say about all this so far, and I bet you all are tired of all this reading but then I wanted to put it down for the sake of posterity. So we will get back to business.
Thursday, January 22, 2009
All of these quotes were taken out of the USA Today paper, the Jan 21,2009 edition. President Obama said "We have chosen hope over fear," he said, adding that it was time "to pick ourselves up, dust ourselves off" and remake our country. I have a question for ya, remake what country, I like my country. Another quote: The economic crisis is a result of "greed and irresponsibility on the part of some,"the success of the economy depended not just on the size of our gross domestic product but on the reach of our prosperity"-a reference to the growing gap between rich and poor even when the economy was growing in recent years. I got another question for ya, I assume that the "greed and irresponsibility"was caused by the republicans...pssst this guy was even called by his own party as the second biggest liberal in the senate. What I guess you mean by "the reach of our prosperity" is the old rob the rich and give to the poor..Well ya think it might be time to go out and get a job, take on more of that "responsibility?" I do. I really do agree with Obama on his quote "a new era of responsibility." So shall we start with the welfare people that are in their second or third generation of government handouts?? Shall we make them responsible?? (Now I am sure that there are those that we all know that are physically disabled and can not work I am not talking about these folks!)
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
A Childs Bible In A Nutshell
In the beginning, which occurred near the start, there was nothing but God, darkness, and some gas. The Bible says, 'The Lord thy God is one, but I think He must be a lot older than that. Anyway, God said, 'Give me a light!' and someone did. Then God made the world. He split the Adam and made Eve. Adam and Eve were naked, but they weren't embarrassed because mirrors hadn't been invented yet. Adam and Eve disobeyed God by eating one bad apple, so they were driven from the Garden of Eden. Adam and Eve had a son, Cain, who hated his brother as long as he was Abel. Pretty soon all of the early people died off, except for Methuselah, who lived to be like a million or something. One of the next important people was Noah, who was a good guy, but one of his kids was kind of a Ham. Noah built a large boat and put his family and some animals on it. He asked some other people to join him, but they said they would have to take a rain check. After Noah came Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. Jacob was more famous than his brother, Esau, because Esau sold Jacob his birthmark in exchange for some pot roast. Jacob had a son named Joseph who wore a really loud sports coat. Another important Bible guy is Moses, whose real name was Charlton Heston. Moses led the Israel Lights out of Egypt and away from the evil Pharaoh after God sent ten plagues on Pharaoh's people. These plagues included frogs, mice, lice, bowels, and no cable. God fed the Israel Lights every day with manicotti. Then he gave them His Top Ten Commandments. These include: don't lie, cheat, smoke, dance, or covet your neighbor's stuff. Oh, yeah, I just thought of one more: Humor thy father and thy mother. One of Moses' best helpers was Joshua who was the first Bible guy to use spies. Joshua fought the battle of Geritol and the fence fell over on the town. After Joshua came David. He got to be king by killing a giant with a slingshot. He had a son named Solomon who had about 300 wives and 500 porcupines. My teacher says he was wise, but that doesn't sound very wise to me. After Solomon there was a bunch of major league prophets. One of these was Jonah, who was swallowed by a big whale and then barfed up on the shore. There were also some minor league prophets, but I guess we don't have to worry about them. After the Old Testament came the New Testament. Jesus is the star of The New. He was born in Bethlehem in a barn. (I wish I had been born in a barn too, because my mom is always saying to me, 'Close the door! Were you born in a barn?' It would be nice to say, 'As a matter of fact, I was.') During His life, Jesus had many arguments with sinners like the Pharisees and the Democrats. Jesus also had twelve opossums. The worst one was Judas Asparagus. Judas was so evil that they named a terrible vegetable after him. Jesus was a great man. He healed many leopards and even preached to some Germans on the Mount. But the Democrats and all those guys put Jesus on trial before Pontius the Pilot. Pilot didn't stick up for Jesus. He just washed his hands instead. Anyways, Jesus died for our sins, then came back to life again. He went up to Heaven but will be back at the end of the Aluminum. His return is foretold in the book of Revolution.
Monday, January 19, 2009
Consider, for example, the controversy swirling around pastor Rick Warren, invited to deliver the invocation at the inaugural. The choice is controversial because Warren, while something of a moderate in the evangelical world, is a blackhearted villain among gay-rights activists for his support of Proposition 8 in California, which successfully proscribed same-sex marriage. The interesting thing is that throughout the campaign, Obama and Joe Biden took the exact same position as Warren on gay marriage. And yet, gays overwhelmingly supported Obama (and Democrats generally) but consider Warren a slap in the face of the first order. That's one reason why the Warren appearance is so offensive to activists: It conjures the frightening possibility that Obama's election posturing wasn't posturing but rather (gasp!) his actual position.
Sunday, January 18, 2009
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
CIVICS 101 3rd GRADE From a Christian Schoolteacher in Ohio:
The most eye-opening civics lesson I ever had was while teaching third grade this year. The presidential election was heating up and some of the children showed an interest. I decided we would have an election for a class president.We would choose our nominees. They would make a campaign speech and the class would vote.To simplify the process, candidates were nominated by other class members. We discussed what kinds of characteristics these students should have. We got many nominations and from those, Jamie and Olivia were picked to run for the top spot.The class had done a great job in their selections. Both candidates were good kids. I thought Jamie might have an advantage because he got lots of parental support. I had never seen Olivia's mother.The day arrived when they were to make their speeches Jamie went first. He had specific ideas about how to make our class a better place. He ended by promising to do his very best. Every one applauded. He sat down and Olivia came to the podium.Her speech was concise. She said, "If you will vote for me, I will give you ice cream." She sat down. The class went wild. "Yes! Yes! We want ice cream."She surely would say more. She did not have to. A discussion followed. How did she plan to pay for the ice cream? She wasn't sure. Would her parents buy it or would the class pay for it? She didn't know. The class really didn't care. All they were thinking about was ice cream.Jamie was forgotten. Olivia won by a land slide.Every time Barack Obama opens his mouth he offers ice cream and sixty percent of the people react like nine year olds. They want ice cream.
The other forty percent know they're going to have to feed the cow and clean up the mess.
The most eye-opening civics lesson I ever had was while teaching third grade this year. The presidential election was heating up and some of the children showed an interest. I decided we would have an election for a class president.We would choose our nominees. They would make a campaign speech and the class would vote.To simplify the process, candidates were nominated by other class members. We discussed what kinds of characteristics these students should have. We got many nominations and from those, Jamie and Olivia were picked to run for the top spot.The class had done a great job in their selections. Both candidates were good kids. I thought Jamie might have an advantage because he got lots of parental support. I had never seen Olivia's mother.The day arrived when they were to make their speeches Jamie went first. He had specific ideas about how to make our class a better place. He ended by promising to do his very best. Every one applauded. He sat down and Olivia came to the podium.Her speech was concise. She said, "If you will vote for me, I will give you ice cream." She sat down. The class went wild. "Yes! Yes! We want ice cream."She surely would say more. She did not have to. A discussion followed. How did she plan to pay for the ice cream? She wasn't sure. Would her parents buy it or would the class pay for it? She didn't know. The class really didn't care. All they were thinking about was ice cream.Jamie was forgotten. Olivia won by a land slide.Every time Barack Obama opens his mouth he offers ice cream and sixty percent of the people react like nine year olds. They want ice cream.
The other forty percent know they're going to have to feed the cow and clean up the mess.
Monday, January 12, 2009
Monday, January 05, 2009
Happy New Year 2009
As I reflect on 2008, I can say we had a great year:
Blacks are happy; Obama was elected.
Whites are happy, OJ is in jail.
Democrats are happy; George Bush is leaving office.
Republicans are happy: Democrats will finally quit saying George Bush stole the election.
And all of us are so happy; The election is finally over! I think 2009 will be even better: Immediately after his inauguration, Obama will balance the budget, revive the economy, solve the real estate problem, solve the auto industry problem, solve our gas/alternative energy problem, stop the fires and mudslides in California, ban hurricanes and tornadoes, stop identity theft, reverse global warming, find Osama, solve the Israeli-Palestinian conflict, get rid of corruption in government and achieve world peace . Then on the 7th day, He will rest.
My best wishes for 2009.............and remember:"The government cannot give to anyone anything that it does not first take from someone else."
As I reflect on 2008, I can say we had a great year:
Blacks are happy; Obama was elected.
Whites are happy, OJ is in jail.
Democrats are happy; George Bush is leaving office.
Republicans are happy: Democrats will finally quit saying George Bush stole the election.
And all of us are so happy; The election is finally over! I think 2009 will be even better: Immediately after his inauguration, Obama will balance the budget, revive the economy, solve the real estate problem, solve the auto industry problem, solve our gas/alternative energy problem, stop the fires and mudslides in California, ban hurricanes and tornadoes, stop identity theft, reverse global warming, find Osama, solve the Israeli-Palestinian conflict, get rid of corruption in government and achieve world peace . Then on the 7th day, He will rest.
My best wishes for 2009.............and remember:"The government cannot give to anyone anything that it does not first take from someone else."
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