Some great advice from the military

'If the enemy is in range, so are you.'
'It is generally inadvisable to eject directly over the area you just bombed.'
'Whoever said the pen is mightier than the sword obviously never encountered automatic weapons.'
'Five second fuses only last three seconds.'
'Any ship can be a minesweeper. Once.'
'If you see a bomb technician running, try to keep up with him.'
'When one engine fails on a twin-engine airplane you always have enough power left to get you to the scene of the crash.'
Airman, maintain thy air speed, lest the earth rise up and smite you!