Fresh from my shower, a woman stood in front of the mirror complaining to her husband that her breasts are too small. Instead of characteristically
telling her it's not so, he uncharacteristically came up with a suggestion.
"If you want your breasts to grow, then every day take a piece of toilet
paper and rub it between them for a few seconds."
Willing to try anything, she fetch a piece of toilet paper and stood in
front of the mirror, rubbing it between her breasts. "How long will
this take?" she asked
"They will grow larger over a period of years," her husband replied. she
stopped. "Do you really think rubbing a piece of toilet paper between
my breasts every day will make my breasts larger over the years?" Without
missing a beat he said, "Worked for your butt didn't it?"
He's still alive, and with a great deal of therapy he may even walk
again, although he will probably continue to take his meals through a straw.

Stupid, stupid man.