it sure was hot here this summer.

 There was a painter called Jock, who was very interested in making a pound wherever he could. So, he often would thin down his paint to make it go a wee bit further.As it happened, he got away with this for some time but, eventually, the Presbyterian Church decided to do a big restoration job on the roof of one of their biggest churches. Jock put in a bid and because his price was so competitive, he got the job.So he set to it, with a right good will, erecting the trestles and putting up the planks, and buying the paint and ... yes, I am sorry to say, thinning it down with the turpentine.Well, Jock was up on the scaffolding, painting away, the job nearly done, when suddenly there was a horrendous clap of thunder, and the sky opened and the rain poured down, washing the thin paint from all over the church and knocking Jock fair off the scaffold to land on the lawn, among the gravestones, surrounded by telltale puddles of the thinned and useless paint.Jock was no fool. He knew this was a judgment from the Almighty, so he fell on his knees and cried: "Oh, God! Forgive me! What should I do?"And from the thunder, a mighty Voice spoke: "Repaint! Repaint and thin no more!"

This is awesome.

Ahhhh that feels goooood!

A verrryyyy bad makeup job!

 The ant works hard  in the withering heat and the rain all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.  The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.  Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while he is cold and starving. CBS, NBC, PBS, CNN, and ABC shows up to provide pictures of the shivering grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a table filled with food. (Ain't it the truth?)

Oops!

what?

Absolutely the funniest.

Muslim youths crucify a cat in response to an anti-muslim movie produced in the USA. Hmmm the "religion of peac?" Oh sure it is!

It sure was hot this summer!

Little Johnny attended a horse auction with his father. He watched as his father moved from horse to horse, running his hands up and down the horse's legs and rump. After a few minutes, Johnny asked, "Dad, why are you doing that?" His father replied, "Because when I'm buying horses, I have to make sure that they are healthy and in good shape before I buy." Johnny, looking worried, said, "Dad, I think the UPS guy wants to buy Mom."